I’m not really one for a New Years resolution. However by February when it comes time for my birthday, I like to reflect on the past year or ten years and see how I feel. If there’s anything new I’d like to learn, anything I want to work on, or anything I love and I want to keep close.
Change is something that is uncomfortable but so necessary to get us to where we need to be. Where our hearts are happy and where we can be the most “us”. I always think about working with a potters wheel and how much your hands mold that shape, in the beginning it’s just a lump. A wet, sticky, messy lump. But eventually through all the mess... it turns into something beautiful.
This past year has taught me so much and it was so very uncomfortable. But it lead me to this place of acceptance and love for myself I’ve never had before. A love for my family, my life, my business and my friends. I feel so utterly blessed to be slowly regaining our health and getting our lives back to normal.
As I was sitting outside yesterday sanding tiny miniatures under the covered porch listening to the rain fall, my heart was calm and peaceful. You see I’m a slow and simple kind of girl. I don’t like agendas and plans, big crowds or loud places. I like friends, and food, board games and a blanket under the stars. I like slow mornings homeschooling Izzy while Levi plays dinosaurs in his pajamas. I don’t like to rush or feel pressured. I like fields of flowers and there’s something about an old farmhouse that makes me want to stay a while. That’s just me.
I have spent most of my 36 years apologizing for being me and not like everyone else. Which is crazy because we’re all so different, I wasn’t broken, there was nothing that I needed to “fix” and once I stopped trying to change me, the anxiety left. This past year has shown me just how beautiful that slow and simple life is. That I was made this way for a reason and that there are so many people like me who also love these things (and me). I’m grateful for that most of all. This growth and change. New acceptance of myself and the ability to walk away from situations that make me feel the need to compromise or change who I was created to be. My soul is happy here.
So as a new year starts tomorrow for me, 37 is looking pretty good. I’m leaving everything in the past that needs to stay and taking all of the things I love along with me. You know I’ll be wishing for that old farmhouse when I blow out my candles... but I can wait however long it takes because this past year has taught me so much. One thing is to TRUST the timing of your life and that it just works together when it’s supposed to, and when you’re ready. You have to go through the messy parts to turn out so beautifully.
I hope that you realize today that you are special the way you were created. That you’re loved and beautiful and so worthy of whatever your heart desires.
Thank you all for loving me and sharing this Gypsy Heart mini business, giving me a reason to pour my heart into your miniatures and send them to you with love. I may be slow getting them out to you sometimes, but eh... I like to take my time. I read a quote that says “Why rush something you want to last forever?” and that couldn’t be more true in every aspect of life.